


Transcript of the infamous 2019/06/17 livestream on Matthew's Vlog

by Cardinal_Sin (HU_shipper)



Category: Powerwolf (Band)
Genre: F/M, I REGRET NOTHING, M/M, YouTube, matthew has a youtube channel, transcript of a fictious livestream, youre welcome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 17:20:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19873249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HU_shipper/pseuds/Cardinal_Sin
Summary: In which Matthew Greywolf has a YouTube channel and livestreams a day off on tour for the fans. It goes horribly.Enjoy.





	Transcript of the infamous 2019/06/17 livestream on Matthew's Vlog

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Raijin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raijin/gifts).



Transcript of the infamous 2019/06/17 livestream by Matthew Greywolf of Powerwolf, known on YouTube as Matthew's Vlog – transcribed by @cardinalxsin

Original video **here**

**[Camera turns on, it's a little shaky and a bit too bright but it soon adjusts. Matthew is in the frame, holding a cup of coffee in his free hand. The camera is mounted on the selfie stick he's holding in his other hand. His hair is in an intricate braid, pulled over his right shoulder.]**

Matthew: Hello, wolf pack, and welcome to my first –

Charles, off-camera: And last!

Matthew: – live vlog! Don't mind Charles, he hasn't had his fifth coffee yet so he's a little grumpy. Anyway, we have a day off today, and we thought maybe we could relax or go sightseeing, and I wanted to let you guys be a part of that experience!

Falk, walking across the frame in the background with a toothbrush in his hand: Yeah, because you're sadistic.

Matthew: It's gonna be fun bab – bro! Brother. Falk.

Charles, off-camera: **[snickering]**

**[Matthew starts walking, the camera now showing the hallway of the tourbus instead of him. He goes to the kitchen and sits down at the small table. Jenny and Attila are also in the kitchen, talking off-camera. Unintelligible. The camera switches back to show Matthew.]**

Matthew: So here's our kitchen! We mostly have uhhh coffee and sometimes instant ramen, but yeah. It's just coffee, guys. And alcohol, but shhhh about that. **[He places his finger on his lips in a "silence" way.]** We also have...... **[he rummages around in the cabinets]** oreos, apparently, and of course, a good snack for any occasion, communion wafers. **[Five seconds of Matthew munching a handful of communion wafers.]** Oh, and here's my hairbrush! That's not exactly sanitary, but in my defense Jenny needed it to create me this masterpiece. **[He gestures at the braids]** Say hi, Jenny!

**[Camera pans to Jenny Dorn, who has her hair in the same braided style. She waves and smiles. She is wearing a faded Powerwolf t-shirt and pyjama pants with unicorns on them. The digital clock behind her reads 9:15.]**

Matthew, after swallowing the communion wafers: So, after this healthy, nutritious, and definitely Powerwolf-approved breakfast, I'm going to take a shower, and then Falk Maria and I will hit the town! I'm sorry, but I don't think either YouTube or our management would be too thrilled if I streamed from the shower – this is kid-friendly after all – I'm going to pass the camera over to Attila, who will do with it as he pleases!

Matthew, to Attila: Please don't fu – mess up the stream, man.

**[Camera is passed to Attila. He is wearing an old Judas Priest t-shirt** _(I think? It's so faded I can barely tell – Cardinal) –_ **and is drinking from a mug that has "shut your" written on it, and underneath there's a small strip of sheet music, with four notes: F, A, C and a high E.]**

Attila: Hey, my friends, so glad to have you here today! Let's have a tour of the bus while Matthew is in the shower!

**[Attila starts walking, the camera still pointed at him. In the background, Jenny is making twisting motions with her hand, indicating that Attila should switch back to normal from the front-facing camera. Attila does not take the clue.]**

Attila, half in-frame: So friends, this is the bunk area. There's three rows here, and of course the middle row is the most comfortable, so sometimes we fight each other for them. No, no, I'm kidding.

Roel, off-camera, muffled: He's _not_.

Attila: Oh, Roel is awake! This is rare, he usually sleeps until past ten. Good morning, Roel!

**[Roel pulls back the curtain of one of the middle row bunks and pokes out his head. He squints against the light. He is not happy about being awake so early.]**

Roel, a little slurred: Either bring me coffee or fuck off, Attila.

Attila: Ask Charles, or get it for yourself. **[quietly:]** He's an asshole when he's sleepy.

Roel: I HEARD THAT!

**[Attila keeps walking, goes to the communal area/living room-ish. Charles is sitting on the couch, with his legs pulled underneath him. He's wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt. Both are too large for him. He's holding a mug with a modified Starbucks logo with his own face on it** _(a fan present from last year, he even shared it on Instagram – Cardinal)_ **and he's reading something on his phone. His hair is in a low ponytail and his glasses are perched low in his nose, almost about to fall off. Falk is sitting on the ground on a yoga mat. His legs are crossed in a lotus position, his eyes are closed in meditation. Attila crouches next to him.]**

Attila, whispering: Hey Falk, is video...

**[Falk's mouth twitches. He does not open his eyes.]**

**[A door opens. Steam pours out, and from the steam, like a phoenix from the ashes, Matthew emerges. He has a towel wrapped around his wais, otherwise he appears to be completely naked.]**

Attila: Matthew, you said you wanted to keep this family friendly! Put some clothes on!

**[In the bottom left corner of the frame, Falk's eyes snap open. He seems annoyed that he had to interrupt his meditation, and for _that_. He glares at Matthew. Matthew blushes a little and starts walking, passes the camera.]**

Matthew, muttering: Not my fault he brings the camera back here, like he doesn't walk around like this either- **[the rest is unintelligible as he goes too far from the camera for the mic to pick it up.]**

Attila: So, until Matthew puts on some clothes, let's chat! **[Falk and Charles glare at him. Or rather, at the back of his head, as the stream is still going from the front-facing camera.]** Charles, what are you reading?

Charles: A wikihow on how to secretly dispose of vlogging equipment and/or vloggers.

Falk: I can't tell if you're serious right now cause your resting bitch face is impossible to read... But just in case it's real, please don't kill Matthew.

Charles: ...Fine. But just because I owe you one for – you know.

Attila: I have no idea what they are talking about and I will now leave this area before I become a second potential victim in their planned hate crime against vloggers.

**[Shaky camera footage of Attila walking through the bunk area again. There's a middle finger sticking out through the curtains of Roel's bunk – Attila ignores it. He arrives back in the kitchen, and hands back the selfie stick to Matthew.]**

Matthew: Hello, beautiful people! Now that I'm back in enough clothes that YouTube won't demonetize my videos, let's check the weather and see if Falk and I can leave soon for some sightseeing.

**[Matthew steps outside and then back in in a second.]**

Matthew: It's raining like fu – it's raining cats and dogs out there, I'm not going anywhere unless it clears up in five... four... three... two... one. **[He looks outside again.]** Nope, still raining. Fu – Falk it, I'm taking a nap.

**[Matthew walks back to the communal area and sets the camera down in a corner. Falk and Charles are both sitting on the couch. Charles is texting on his phone, smiling, and Falk is reading a book. They do not notice the camera.]**

Matthew, whispering: And now, while your gentle and gracious host takes a nap, you will get the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to study the wild Falk and Charles in their natural habitats. Have fun!

**[Two hours, forty-seven minutes and eighteen seconds of Falk and Charles reading in silence.]**

Matthew, off-camera: I'm back!

**[Camera moves; now Matthew is in focus in selfie mode again.]**

Matthew: Since it's still raining, I've decided to skip sightseeing and have some fun with my great friends and bandmates, here, on the bus.

Charles: Not in a million years.

Matthew, talking over him: We have a selection of games with us that we definitely should not play as there's still half a tour to go and we can't kill each other... Anyway, Monopoly or Uno?

Falk: Oh Lord up in the heavens, please end my suffering.

**[Matthew turns around to glare at him.]**

Matthew: Uno it is! **[shouting:]** Come on people! Uno time!

**[Jenny, Attila and Roel arrive to the living room-ish, which is now way too crammed. The pack of Uno cards is already on the small coffee table somehow, sadly it's not obvious who put it there. They manage to sit down on the two couches and two chairs around it, although it's a pretty tight fit. Roel and Charles are sitting on one couch, Attila and Jenny on the other. Falk sits on one of the chairs. Matthew places the camera on a shelf, so the whole area is in frame. He sits down in the last empty chair, across from Falk, who is already shuffling the deck.**

**Falk deals, and playing begins. They're mostly quiet until Roel says Uno. After that, there are desperate attempts to keep him in the game, involving reverse and wild cards, until it gets to Charles. Charles looks at Roel with an apologetic face.]**

Roel: Don't you dare.

Charles: I'm so sorry.

Roel: No...

Charles: Green. **[He puts down a draw 4 card.]**

**[The game progresses, and eventually Jenny wins by sheer dumb luck or careful strategy, as Attila places a wild card with the correct colour right before her turn.]**

Matthew: You cheated! You two worked together all along!

Attila: You can't prove that.

Falk: Guys, this is just a game. Stop it.

Matthew: Fine.

Attila: Fine.

**[Silent staring.]**

Roel: Okay, what are we having for lunch?

Charles: You could go pick up something... I'm thinking pizza?

Roel: Uh, excuse you, why me?

Charles: Then who?

Matthew: I can go. Falk, wanna help?

Falk: No, not really.

**[Matthew glares at him.]**

Matthew: Falk!

Falk: Oh, yeah, right, I'm coming.

**[Matthew takes the camera from the shelf, then walks to the fron of the bus, Falk in tow. He grabs his coat from the hanger next to the door and steps out into the rain. Falk follows him.]**

Falk: This is nasty. Why am I here?

Matthew: Emotional support. Plus I can't vlog and carry pizza at the same time, so thanks for your help!

**[They start walking. Falk goes first, navigating with the map app in his phone. Matthew walks behind him, humming Baby Shark. He turns the camera from side to side, showing beautiful old buildings.]**

Matthew: Hi, can we film here?

Pizzeria employee: No.

Matthew: Aw, rats. Falk, can you order? I'll be outside with the stream.

**[Matthew goes outside before Falk can answer. Twenty-three minutes of pigeons walking around in Matthew's vicinity. Falk appears with several pizza boxes.]**

Falk: Okay, let's go.

**[Matthew hurries after him.]**

Matthew: Excuse me, Mr Schlegel, care to comment on the state of carbonated beverages?

Falk: No.

Matthew: I'll ask differently. Did you buy me cola?

Falk: No.

Matthew: Traitor!!!!

**[The rest of the walk is quiet. Matthew is still humming Baby Shark.]**

Matthew, practically falling through the bus door: We brought lunch!

Falk: Sorry, what did you do to deserve that 'we'?

Matthew: I kept you company! Come on...

**[Matthew places the camera on the kitchen table and hurries after Falk to the communal area. Approximately three hours of the camera pointing to the corridor. No movement, just distant sounds of talking and laughter.]**

**[Matthew comes running.]**

Matthew: Oh shit, I forgot about this. **[He picks up the camera.]** Sorry guys, the whole stream completely slipped my mind, hope some of you are still around though! **[He starts walking back to the communal area.]** Anyway, come on, we're gonna watch a movie, you can watch with us.

Attila, off-camera: Matthew that's illegal.

Charles: Shush, this is just James Bond, nobody cares. Matthew, sit your ass down.

**[Matthew sits his ass down.]**

Matthew: Where's Roel?

Falk: Said he'd seen Casino Royale way too many times and he will not watch it again, band bonding be damned.

Matthew: A shame. Attila, hit it!

**[Camera points at TV where Casino Royale starts up. There's about an hour of just that, until the part where Bond meets Vesper.]**

Charles: Alright, this is way too boring like this. I'll bring some snacks.

**[He walks out of frame.]**

Matthew, yelling after him: Bring Doritos!

**[There's another ten minutes of movie.]**

Matthew: Alright, what the hell is taking Charles so long? Is he cooking a pig or something? I'll go ask him what's up.

**[Camera moves as Matthew stands up, starts walking to the kitchen. Kitchen door opens. Charles and Roel jump apart. Both are flushed, Charles' hair is a mess and there's a small pink bruise on his neck. Camera view drops to the ground.]**

Charles: What the fuck Matthew?

Matthew: I'm so sorry! I didn't know!

Roel: Why all the drama? He can edit it out later, no?

Matthew, whispering: It's live...

Roel: It's WH-

**[Livestream cuts off]**

Related videos:

 **EXPLAINING THE ENDING OF THE LIVESTREAM | Matthew's Vlog** (uploaded 2019/06/18 by MatthewsVlog)

 **Compilation of Charles Greywolf and Roel Van Helden Acting Like a Married Couple – BONUS the Confirmation That They Actually Are** (uploaded 2019/06/21 by LupusDaemon1s)


End file.
